Morticia is the matriarch
She leads the Addams brood
And when she speaks in French
You should see her husband’s mood.
She senses something is amiss
That Gomez is not sincere
From the moment he begins to kiss
Her hand up to her ear.
For it is not in her husband
To keep a secret from his wife
And that’s what sometimes changes things
From calm to enormous strife.
Plus…don’t you ever mess with Grandma
She’s feisty but she’s old
Don’t let that ever fool you
She’s strong and very bold
She mixes her concoctions
Her potions are bizarre
The colour mostly lacking
And the consistency of tar.
That’s nothing compared to Fester
The uncle in this clan
His pallor shows he’s lacking
Being outside, in the sun, like a man.
He’s really rather jolly
In a child like sort of way
And helps with the narration
Although this show is not a play.
Wednesday and Pugsley make their claim
They’re the Addams kids in this funny show
Although Wednesday not so young any more
As we watch her love for a normal boy grow.
We won’t say any more about that
Brother and sister though they may be
When an outsider comes into their life
Pugsley’s clearly not showing any glee.
But good old Lurch, the silent type
With not much to say at all
Doesn’t miss anything that’s going on
In this mansion, storeys tall.
Will he spill what’s going on
Or keep his voice so quiet
In order for you to find this out
A ticket – you need to buy it.
So see you in October
When our next show shines on stage
In the meantime we’re rehearsing
Making perfect every page.